I was not from Kansas City at all, and they definitely turned their nose up at me since I was not from there. When you do meet other gay people, they usually have blue collar/restaurant types of jobs (which I'm not knocking), but they always gave me crap for having went to college. It definitely is a more 'blue collar' gay scene. You can smoke anywhere in Kansas City, MO, and believe me, they do: almost everyone smokes in them, and you will definitely reek after just an hour there. There are a few gay bars, all of them are in pretty bad shape (except 303 in Westport). When you go out to the bars and meet people (which is really the only way to do it - they only have a gay chorus and gay bars - even the 'gay sports' teams in KC are all the bar employees), they assume you are looking for 'something' if you are talking to them.
KC does have gay bars, and they do have a gay pride, but it is an extremely cliquey scene.
I am a 25 year old gay man who recently lived in Kansas City for 2 Years before relocating to Chicago (finally).